101 rules about being a spy
by Amaya Hikaru
Summary: My guide to being a spy.
1. Chapter 1

_**Disclaimer:** I do not own Burn Notice in any way._

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Chapter 1 - fun

Nine girls sat in a circle in the middle of a round building. each held a playing card. they were playing a game called 'Mafia'. one stood in the middle of the circle and was the narrator. two had red cards and were 'mafia'. two had yellow and were 'detectives'. the rest had green and were 'citizens'. It was the second day of young women's girls camp. there were over fifty f them in three round cabins or Yurts. One girl sat in the corner (as much of a corner as you could get from a round room). she snapped her head up and stared out one window. several men walked past, the girl stood and walked into the middle of the circle.

"I need all of you to go inside the bunks hidden from the doors. pair up if you need, don't move, don't make any noise and don't pass in front of this window." she pointed to the one she'd seen the men pass in front of earlier. "This isn't a game." she added and pulled a side arm out from her jacket.

"What's going on? several girls cried as the others did as she said. she turned to the ones who had spoken.

"This is a 9 mil. Beretta. Government issued. move or i may have to use it.." she snarled and they lept to the bunk beads. The girl snuck out a second door in the back of the yurt. she used the hill behind the cabins to hide as she ran over to the other two cabins and passed the orders along. Her sister was in the last yurt.

"What's going on, Jana?"

"Just do it please, Roxy." Jana replied and squared her shoulders and walked out of the cabin. she hid her gun and put her fingers to her mouth. she whistled loudly, getting the five men's attention.

"There she is!" one yelled and ran at Jana. she stuck out her arm and clothes lined the man in the neck. she walked forward and punched one in the face and broke his nose. she tripped another and kicked the fourth in the stomach. she faced the last one and brought her arm up to punch him, making him flinch. she smiled and elbowed him instead. he crumpled to the ground. she sighed and walked into her cabin and took a small black bag out of her five gallon bucket. she walked back out and opened the pulled out several white zip ties and tied the men's hands behind their backs. she pulled out a black cell phone out of her pocket and dialed . she walked to where she had hidden her gun and and pulled the clip out and checked it while she waited. the young women and leaders began slowly dribbling out of the cabins.

"Michael, why the heck i just had to knock out five men." she asked.

What?!" a male voice sounded very mad.

"My thought exactly."

"I'm sending you a plane ticket right away, you're coming home." he said.

"Uh, that may not be such a good idea. Roxy's here, I have to go. I'll be in touch." she said and shut off the phone. she put the gun back together and made sure the safety was on then put it in her holster.

"Jana, what on Earth?!" Roxy yelled.

"Please calm down. I've got some business to take care of." Jana said and a pray car started speeding down the dirt road towards them. Jana sighed and stepped in front of it. the car stopped a few feet from her and the driver got out.

"Jana, some men..." He didn't finish, Jana moved to show him the men on the ground.

"You're late, Nate." she replied and grabbed her sisters arm. she dragged her over away from Nate and the others.

"Rox, I've got to leave town for a bit. you understand right? I'll be with Mike and Fi."

"'kay. but what happened?"

"Listen, I'm a government spy and I've been gone before and now I've got men after me. trust me and stay away from me, i don't wanna put you or the family in danger." Jana explained.

"Sure." Roxy was being sarcastic but the look in Jana's eyes made her understand. this was real. "Okay, just be careful." Jana nodded.

"Nate, get away from my car!" she turned around and began taking her stuff out from the cabin, they put it in the back of the car.

"I'm really sorry but something came up and i have to go." she explained to her leaders and grabbed her keys from Nate. they climbed in the fully restored 1967 Shelby GT500.

"Jana!" Roxy yelled as they began to back away in the car.

"Yeah?"

"Where are you going?" she asked. Jana smiled and grabbed her pair of sun glasses from the dash board.

"Miami!" Jana laughed and they pulled away. She saw Roxy waving in the review mirror.

"Miami?"

"Mike is there, we need to sort some things out." Jana replied Nate's question and pulled out her cell phone. "Michael?"

"Jana, what the heck is going on."

"I had hoped you could tell me." Jana replied as they pulled out onto the paved road.

"Great. Where are you?"

"Coming to you."

"But i thought you said you couldn't."

"That was before your brother decided to kindly break into my Shelby and drive it to me in UTAH!!" Jana yelled, trying to get her point across to both of them.

"Sorry." Nate whispered.

"HE WHAT?!" Mike roared.

"It's fine, it was less awkward with Rox."

"Do you need tickets?"

"No, I was going to visit you after camp anyways. Nate do you need a ticket?" Jana asked the man in the passenger seat. "Nate!" she snapped her fingers in front of him to get his attention.

"What, no."

"Okay, we'll be there in a few days."

"What about the car?" Mike asked.

"I'm not poor Mike, I'll have it shipped."

"Okay see you in a while."

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_Rule 1 about being a spy: don't go on a camping trip unless you plan on things going wrong._


	2. Chapter 2

_**Disclaimer: **I do not own Burn Notice in any way._

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Chapter 2 - Flight

_**My name is Michael Westen, I used to be a spy until, **__"We got a burn notice on you, you're blacklisted."_ _**When you're burned you've got nothing. no cash, no credit, no job history, you're stuck in what ever city they decide to dump you in. **__"Where am I?", "Miami." __**You do whatever work comes your way. You rely on anyone's who's still talking to you: a trigger-happy ex-girlfriend. **__"Shall we shoot them?" __**an old friend who used to inform on you to the FBI. **__"You know spies, bunch of bitchy little girls." __**Family too, if you're desperate. Or even a government agent. Bottom line, until you figure out who burned you, you're not going anywhere.**_

"So, how long you gonna be down?" Nate asked as the plane taxied out to the runway.

"As long as I'm needed." Jana replied and closed her eyes and rested her head on the seat. A few hours later they landed in the Miami airport. They got off and Michael was waiting for them along with Fiona. Jana gave a girly squeal and ran to hug Fi. she smiled immensely and turned to Michael.

"I've not seen you guys for a long time." she offered her hand to Mike. he shook it then paused.

"What?" she asked, the next second she was caught up in a rare hug from the spy. Nathan coughed and they walked out of the airport.

"Are those friends of yours?" Jana asked, holding Michael's hand like a child.

"Who?"

"The four agents tailing us."

"FOUR?!" Mike asked astounded. "I only counted two." he explained.

"the cashier at the fast food spot and the woman with the children."

"Ah."

"Not bad." Fiona commented.

"They're my people, I could see them miles away. not meaning to brag." she smiled and they got in Michael's car. They stopped my Mike's mom's house to drop off Nate. Jana got out to let Nate out of the back seat but Madeline spotted her.

"Jana!" she called from the door.

"Hullo, Mrs. Westen."

"Oh please dear, call me Maddie."

"Sorry, you know it's too awkward." Jana replied and tried getting in the car again.

"Well wait just a minute, what are you doing here?"

"Just visiting Michael for a while." she tried to cut off the conversation.

"Well if you need anywhere to stay you know we have an extra bedroom."

"alright!" Jana called and Mike tried desperately not to speed away. They pulled into the warehouse where Mike housed on the second level. Jana caught a quick glimpse at the room below his and saw there was no one living there. They went up stairs and she instinctively went and sat on the counter in the makeshift kitchen. she paused and jumped down when she realized what she'd done.

"It's okay, it's a nice little quirk of yours." Mike and Fiona said at the same time. they glanced at each other and let an unsaid message pass.

"I noticed that the room beneath yours is empty." she noted and raised an eyebrow.

"Drug runner." Mike replied, he knew that look of hers.

"lovely." she smiled and hopped down. "Who's the landlord?"

"A fella named Oleg, why?"

"Well I've been looking for a place in Miami."

"He's upstairs." Mike said cautiously.

"great." her eyes sparkled as she bounced from the room. She ran up the stairs two at a time and knocked on his blue-green door.

"Hello?" Oleg answered the door, surprised to see her.

"I was wondering how much the first floor of this building is to rent monthly."

"Rent?"

"Yes. I pay you, you let me live there."

"I know what it is. Uh, 200.00 a month." Oleg replied.

"Perfect. here's the first 5 months." and she handed him a small paper bag with fifty twenty dollar bills." The man was stunned by the amount. "well paying job." she explained.

"Oh." He was still confused but handed her the key anyways.

"Thank you very much." and she went gliding down the stairs to Michael and Fiona waiting at his door.

"I have now rented it for the next 5 months."

"where did you get a thousand dollars?" Fi asked.

"Government pays well." the answer seemed obvious to her. She sighed and walked out to the car. The sound of an engine approaching made her drop behind the car and pull out her Beretta. She saw the black tires stop and someone step out. Jana kept on the other side of the car as the person. They walked up the stairs to Mike's apartment. Mike looked out after him and saw her crouching.

"He's a friend." Mike called down to her and she nodded. She had no idea who this man was but she didn't trust him. She turned around into the chest of a man.

Rules # 2: make sure you know who you're friends friends are.

3: Keep tabs on your bosses.


	3. Chapter 3

_**Disclaimer: **I do not own Burn Notice in any way._

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Chapter 3 - Reserved

"Chris? Did you follow me?" Jana asked, taking a step back.

"Lovely to see you too, Jana." The man called Chris said. Jana sighed and walked over to her door. She pushed it open to let him in. The apartment was completely empty. Jana sighed and started looking around.

"We need you to do something for us." Chris said.

"I'm kind of busy with my own stuff." She replied.

"I'm sorry to hear that. However you're the only one who can help us."

"What is it?"

"We just need you to get some info about a woman and her associates."

"That's it?"

"That's all."

"Fine." she sighed. "When do you need it by?"

"Friday."

"Done, go." she muttered and walked up some stairs leading to a single bedroom with a small bathroom. when she returned down stairs Chris was gone. she laughed and walked outside and up to Mike's rooms. The man who had been there before was gone now. Jana grabbed Fiona's arm and began towing her from the room.

"Going somewhere?" Mike asked.

"Furniture shopping." and they were gone. Jana and Fiona returned an hour later with several large boxes and bags, filling up the Charger completely.

"Have fun?" Michael asked.

"Much." They replied and began hauling stuff in the apartment. Michael came down to see the goods and saw plastic on the floor and painting tape on the walls. Jana had some old clothes on and was painting the ceiling in one room beige, while Fiona painted the walls a deep red.

"Nice." he commented and went to hold a paint can up for Jana to reach easier.

"Go look at the paper on the island, and paint please." Jana snapped and continued lathering the ceiling in color..

"Okay..." he hesitated and found the gray to paint her room. when he came back after finishing the room the women had already finished the rest of the apartment and were rolling carpet out. Jana then handed Fiona a rented staple gun for her to get the carpet. She walked over to the kitchen and began laying a cherry hard wood floor.

"Can i help with anything?" He asked. Jana sighed and looked at Fiona, who took the hint.

"You can start unscrewing the doors."

"Why?"

"Because we're replacing them all with wooden ones that have metal barriers on the inside. Making them essentially bulletproof." Fiona replied.

"Okay." And he went around unscrewing the doors. He came back later and placed the screws on the island. The paint around the rooms was mostly dry. There was a dark leather couch in the front room along with an electric piano. There was an intricately carved wooden dining table in the red room, with chairs to match. Fiona was hauling more boxes in from outside. Jana was on the floor in the bathroom laying a beautiful marble floor. The shower stall was glass and the walls were covered in tiles that looked like Van Gogh's _Starry Night._

"Okay I'm done." Mike said walking in. "You wanna tell me why you're in a bad mood so suddenly?"

"My car isn't here yet." Jana replied.

"Madeline invited us over for dinner." Fiona corrected.

"Oh. did you do this?" Mike asked and opened the shower door stall. he gently ran his fingers over the inch wide and tall tiles.

"Yeah." She replied. "Art and some other things help to calm me down and I got bored so i did that. We finished painting and Fiona's carrying in the Furniture." She replied.

"It's beautiful." He said.

"Meh." she sighed.

"What's Fiona carrying in now?" Mike asked.

"None of your concern." she replied and layed the last tile then shooed him out.

"Where did you get the money for all of this?" Michael asked.

"I told you, The government pays well." Jana replied and pulled her cell phone out as it began to ring. She looked at it and sighed.

"What?"

"I have to go do some stuff." she replied and walked into her room. She put on a backpack and came back out.

"If i find anything wrong about this place when i get back, you're in trouble." She said and tossed a key to Fiona.

"When will you be back?" Fi asked.

"I dunno." she said and walked out.

"What's in the box?" Mike asked when she was out of hearing range.

"I'm not sure, and I'm not gonna let you find out." Fiona replied and pulled him from the Apartment.

Later Jana walked out of her apartment wearing a white dress shirt and a tie, Mike was just getting out of his car.

"You look spiffy." He commented.

"Dinner with your mother, remember."

"Ah, good luck."

"Right." she laughed and walked out the metal doors.

* * *

The next day Jana was doing sit-ups facing Mike's door in the inside. She wore a black tank top and shorts as she counted slowly. There was a click and the door began to open. Jana grabbed her favorite beretta that lay beside her and pointed it at the intruder. (she and Mike agreed that when he left he would knock twice when he came back.) A middle aged man walked in with a six-pack of beer in his hand.

"Don't move." Jana muttered and stood up.

"Woah!" The man exclaimed. "Mike hire a new guard dog?"

"Who are you calling dog?" Jana asked and stepped into the light.

"A very cute dog." He said.

"You know Mike?" Jana asked lowering the gun slightly.

"Yeah, we work together." The man replied. Jana laughed once and tucked her gun into her pants. Mike walked in then.

"Oh yeah, Jana this is Sam. He works with me sometimes. Sam, Jana. She's a government agent that's here for protection." Mike said and walked over to the fridge. Jana kept breathing heavily and nodded.

"Protection? Government Agent?" Sam asked Mike.

"Yep. she's an old friend who was in trouble, so we helped."

"We?"

"Fiona and I."

"Oh. Nice to meet you." Sam said and shook her hand.

"Oh, how was dinner last night?"

"Dinner?"

"My mother asked her and Fiona to eat with her last night." Michael explained.

"Okay." Sam said and sat in a chair with a beer. Jana laughed and tossed her gun to Mike and went back to sit ups.

"How long have you been doing that?" Mike asked walking over to her.

"Since you left." Mike checked his watch.

"That was three hours ago." Jana smiled up at him.

"I know." She laughed then started coughing and did a back flip onto the floor. she coughed for a while and Mike knelt by her. he put a hand on her back.

"Are you okay?" He asked. She stopped then nodded. She stood up and Mike caught the glimpse of blood on her mouth but she walked over to the sink and got a drink of water, washing the blood away.

"Even I don't do that." He cautioned her.

"I know." she gasped. Jana shook her head and wiped the sweat from her face with a cloth.

"Hey, why don't you go change and take a shower, I'll be here." Mike said.

"Fine." she sighed and walked to the door, shutting it behind her.

* * *

Rule 4: Avoid contact with your friend's parents.

Rule 5: Time your workouts.


End file.
